Today has been a dreadfully difficult but beautiful day. I woke up and did a few chores at home, packed my backpack and off I went to my second home, Starbucks. I worked on a few things while there, including yesterday’s post. Took a 0.4 mile walk to Whole Foods where I bought flowers and ice-cream for my aunt who was having a broody day. I then walked for 2.1 miles from Whole Foods to my aunt’s place. Disclaimer: I really enjoy walking in case you are wondering why anyone sane would want to walk almost 3 miles in a 70 plus Fahrenheit blaze. I also don’t have much of a choice. I don’t own a car and the area I live in is inaccessible. I often have to walk a mile or so to get to the nearest public transportation, and if my journey is 2 miles long then there’s no way I’m paying full cost for half the journey. Or perhaps this intense trekking might have to do with the fact that I’m broke at the moment. It’s a matter of perspective, you choose yours, and I’m sticking to mine.
When I got to my aunt’s house, I washed the dishes, swept and took out the trash for her. I arranged the flowers and was on my way out when she walked in. I kind of wanted to surprise her, by doing all of the above and disappearing before she got home, but oh well. She and I and a family friend prayed before I left, which I enjoyed very much. I walked out of her house feeling like “I’m okay, I can do this.” Truth is, I was feeling kind of crappy much of the day and anytime I feel that way I like going out of my way and doing something kind for someone else. Somehow it always helps to make me feel better, whether the person acknowledges it or not. It’s the thought of being kind when I’m not feeling like it inside, that brings comfort to me.
I received an interview call from South Korea on my way home which lasted for a total of 6 minutes. An interview that short you ask? Yes, my friend, 6 minutes. Well, I’m sure at this point you know how the story ends, denied. To be quite frank, I too don’t know what went wrong, my guess is that the person on the other side of the line could tell that I was huffing and puffing, in short, not ready for the interview. Hey, it slipped my mind for a good second and when the interviewer unexpectedly called, I was walking on a busy street. One minute we were talking and the next he just was done, just like that. It’s the not giving me a chance that hurt me more than not getting the job.
I wasn’t deeply hurt or saddened by this experience, it was more like I was disappointed. No one applies for a job hoping not to make it pass a hello. We all want to be heard, we want to be considered, we want to be understood and so forth. Nonetheless, I went about the rest of my day intentionally forcing myself to be grateful for what is in front of me, for what I have. As disappointing as the experience was, I’m grateful for the ability to say I can try again, I can apply for another job and I can try somewhere else. An ability denied to many. In the face of disappointing rejection, I’m choosing to focus on my blessings. My aunt, life, my family…etc..and most of all my feet for their perseverance and faithfulness. Haaa.
My prayer for you today is that you will
KEEP ON GOING.
KEEP ON HOPING.
KEEP ON TRYING.
KEEP ON KEEPING AND NEVER GIVE UP.